LatinosUSA

He passed by too many children having fun on his way to the hospital.

There were children having fun even as he came up the stairs. Children and parents, caretakers, children with broken arms or legs, children in wheelchairs, with bandaged heads and an eye, all recovering with the greatest medicine known to mankind – laughter.

But he wasn’t having any fun at all. He wasn’t worthy of having fun. A man so selfish as himself shall never know happiness in any of its forms. A man so vile as to pray for the death of his own child, that was him.

He checked in at the reception and went into the room where his girlfriend of two years was about to give birth, and he passed more happy children and parents on the way. With every step he was growing more jealous on their happiness. How could all those men have children with women they actually loved? How could all those women have children with men they actually loved? Or where most of them acting?

Well he couldn’t act. He hated his junkie girlfriend, her color tattoos, her pierced nipples and navel and ears, nose, upper lip, brows, tongue. And especially her dreadlocks. She probably loved him only cuz he was the dealer around the campus and traded the stuff for blowjobs.

Anyway, they had no business having a kid together. It felt like they didn’t have the right to. And now, like the plane was about to crash, the atheist in him gave way to a praying zealot that begged God to kill his child. If only the child was born dead, as the nurses informed there was a fairly big chance of due to issues with the respiratory system, it would be, to him, like Jesus Christ dying so the people can have another chance at life.

As he greeted his girlfriend, he remembered that she had a demon head tattooed between her legs with a piercing where the demon’s nose was. Shit, that’s gonna be uncomfortable.

He kissed her, said he wasn’t feeling too well, went to the bathroom, sat on the toilet, fished inside his inner pocket for a bag of weed, held it above the toilet, breathed deep.

“A deal, God. Give me a dead child and I’ll give you my life.”

He knew no prayers so just breathed deep emptied the bag in the toilet, flushed.

When he came out he saw nurses rushing into his girlfriend’s room.

‘A life ain’t saved just because it’s born.’

‘A life ain’t saved just because it’s born.’

‘A life ain’t saved just because it’s born.’

This mantra was the closest he came to a prayer.