LatinosUSA

we all know what makes an

athlete great

what makes a martial

artist great

a fisherman

a chef

a mountain climber

a race pilot

a painter

a hunter

sure

but

what makes a gambler

great?

Now this is rarely

if ever

asked

Somehow the answer, “he who wins

most and loses least is

a great gambler,” remains

unsatisfactory

It would’ve been fine

if we were talking about

a boxer for example,

but gambling… that’s another

hell entirely

winning a lot

doesn’t make you a good

gambler. A lucky guy

maybe

but great gambler?

Not so

much

I don’t think there’s

such a thing as a great gambler

but I do think this one kid

from my hometown came

quite close

He didn’t win or lose

or gamble a lot in the first

place, but he

was always the dumbass who said

shit like, “Hey! Bet you I

can throw this here

stone all the way over that

there branch on that tree.”

And before picking

up the stone he’d take out a

butterfly knife from some pocket

and open it before you. “If I miss,

I get eight cuts across the

arsehole. But if I don’t miss, you

get the cuts.”

Or he’d say, “Look, we stand

right here an’ toss the

coin at the wall, see? The one that

lands closer wins.

The loser gets this nail stuck into

his dick hole. You in?”

Whenever there was any

competition of

any kind, he’d instantly come up

with something like, “Loser has to cut off his

foreskin and wear it like

a wedding ring for seven days.”

An’ he was hella serious

with that shit too

He wasn’t the smartest fellow

in town

and I’ve never seen any of

those penalties being

carried out

Soon as he came of age

he suspended all school activity

and got a job

as a construction worker

I’m pretty sure he

never won any

money from gambling

Yet he’s still the greatest

gambler I know

Cuz no matter what

he does

he always bets on his

life