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«I Met God Last Night» by Precious Magdaleno

There was a season in my life when everything felt heavy, like the world’s weight had decided to rest on my chest—lub-dub, lub-dub—as if I didn’t have the audacity to breathe. It felt like a cold wind held captive in my ribs, while sadness wrapped itself around me—not an embrace, but as a second skin, purple not red. Then grief echoed in my every thought, like a black cat whining, and hopelessness painted my days in muted sun grays, something I couldn’t miss. Anxiety turned the simplest of moments into battles, and alongside it were the mental breakdowns that shadowed me like uninvited companions flawed in fire. I was a ship drifting aimlessly in an endless sea, with no lighthouse to guide me home—I was so lost. (sobbing)

In the deep silence, there were weeping angels in the dark. Or maybe there weren’t. But I prayed, though my words often felt hollow and my faith wavered under the storm. “Where are You? Do You hear me?” I whispered into the night, my voice trembling, my heart fractured. I thought I had lost Him—or maybe, I thought, He had lost me. 

But God is never lost, and neither are we.

Days passed like lightning. I was like a lonely little moon. Every hush of the night, I spoke in silent syllables; words unformed but heard by the heavens. And yes, I met God last night, with flowers cradled in His hands. 

In the depths of my despair, I felt the gentle touch of something greater than myself. It wasn’t loud or overwhelming. I didn’t hear words, but I felt His voice as if it were a warm embrace wrapping around my soul: “I am here, child. I’ve always been here.” 

I stopped running. I stopped fighting the chaos in me. Instead, I reached back. 

At that moment, I was found. (tears flowed in my eyes) 

His love poured into every broken corner of my heart. Soft as cotton candy and sweet like honey, a moment where the child embraces her Father. The sadness didn’t vanish instantly, but it softened, like ice melting under a warm hand. I began to listen, truly listen. Not to the noise of my fears or the lies of the world, but only to His voice. It spoke truth in the pause, in whispers of peace, in promises of hope, and in the steady rhythm of my beating heart. As I followed that voice, my life unfolded like a melody I hadn’t realized I was humming all along. (heart is in love) 

I wasn’t lost at all. 
I was being led, and I just hadn’t seen it yet. 
Now I’m truly found by Him.

*featured image https://unsplash.com/@aedrian

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Author’s Bio

Precious Magdaleno is a Filipina night-time poet, artist, wedding planner, and crazy cat lady. She has written and curated two Filipino book anthologies, “Magkasintahan Vol. XXV and 2.0 XV,» under Ukiyoto Publishing and co-authored ten other poetry book anthologies internationally. She values her faith and family the most and draws inspiration from them in her daily life. She began writing after falling in love with classical arts and literature. She finds it therapeutic to write about anything that inspires her, and she will either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. Follow and connect with her on Instagram: @lettersfromprecieux